I Could Really Use...

A Mentor!!

*Hughhh* (exasperated sigh)
I really wish I had some guidance at this point in my life, and many others too. Things are not going as badly as they could be--but that's not the point. The point is, they're not going as awesomely as they could be. And that's what bothers me. It's like having a bunch of resources, but not knowing exactly how to go about refining and utilizing them to achieve your vision. I hate that. I mean, some of it is my fault, OK, maybe more than some. But still, geez, a little mentorship wouldn't hurt.

My own place to live

So, living in DC is sooooo.... ugh, how do I say this nicely...I can't--Stupid!!! Ok, just had to get that out. It's frustrating because the area is SO ridiculously densely populated and finding an inexpensive apartment seems impossible. GRR! The average 1 bedroom is at least 1000, and definitely more. While I could go ahead and indulge in this price tag, I'd rather save my dollars for better things and find less ridiculously expensive housing. AND-- I really...Oh, really, want to get my own place! I've left the last place I was staying and am now floating in another pond. But my own pond would be thrice as nice. I want my own pond!! Not literally...just a place to call my own :( . But I know I'll get one soon :)).

A Good Friend

So living far from my previous home is hard in some ways. I miss the real estate prices, the scenery, a lot of the lifestyle.... But I also miss having close friends. Here, I've yet to develop any. And while I can call whoever whenever, it's just not the same. First, there's no guarantee they'll pick up, second, face-to-faces provide opportunities more and many more different types of relationship bonding, like: "seeing" how the person is doing, and vise versa, sleep overs, long chats over ice cream or other foods and or beverages, baby showeers, birthday parties, lovely outings, catching exciting looks as you retell a recent event, HHhhhahh, ...O my gosh, I TOtally just made it worse. Stupidness. Lol.

Some Love

OK, so don't think I'm talking about men here, because I'm totally not. OK? But I am talking about that place where you feel like you belong and are quite comfortable with the environment around you. Where others' actions are enacted sincerely for your good, whether that good be to see you smile, to see you succeed, to see you correct yourself when you slipped and messed up big time, or just to--well, see you :). I love that place. Sadly, I haven't had that in like forever, and not just becaue I moved here. But that is a whole 'nother blog post that I'll probably never write. Ha. But though it's something I've seldom (hm, can't remember...) experienced, I would love to have it. Love is a necessity in life, from Jesus(got that just need to learn how to accept it better), from the people around you (Uhh, considering my environment-- need that), and yourself to others (OK, fine, need that too. >:P ). Love is a series of consistently sincere motives from a purified heart, for the pure benefit of other expressed through actions that act as the fulfillment of those motives. This, needless to say, would be awesome right now.

Some clarity

I know on this blog it always seems like I'm asking for clarity, because I am. I need more insight to my "big picture", you know, my life. And while it's sloooowly coming, I know if I quit lolly gagging and stay away from discouragement and complacency, I'll get it quicker than I think possible. Now to pep myself up....


Contentment.

I want it. ...That's it.



So, I tried thinking of some other things I could really use...but that pretty much sums it all up. Everything else would just be a derivative of the things I've already listed. Or maybe it would be the other way around.... Oh well. Of to be productive and try to get some of these things now.




L8r :)




O.F.C.J.